This type of interviews study teach this new power and eloquence from girls’ voices within articulation and you can understanding of ideal matchmaking
You to definitely trait that was constantly said whenever discussing properties of your own most useful coming connection is a “husband” who was economically steady. Ladies expressed various other viewpoints about what they sensed it supposed to getting financially steady. Specific girls chatted about the mate given that just seller for the family although some discussed http://hookupmentor.org/onenightfriend-review the companion as adding to your family cash. More often than once, women stated that it need people exactly who you are going to “permit you.” Women just weren’t specific towards type of work or occupation one to its finest mate will have, however, was basically very clear that work must provide “enough to pay the costs otherwise whatever they you need in daily life.” Other fellow member described the greatest spouse a person that “…cannot owe people money after which you will be having fun with my money to expend them right back; no you need to be economically secure, have a good house, an effective employment, a good employment…” Females together with talked about their spouse getting separate and not looking for so you can rely on them for something. It quotation captures this type of thinking: “I would personally want them to be successful, such as for instance a person who might possibly be separate, brand of. They would stand-on their a few ft if i wasn’t doing.”
Objective based
Into the a lot more so you’re able to getting economically secure, lady desired a future partner who was “goal-established.” Even though they don’t promote specific information about just what these types of wants will be, girls concurred one the greatest partner manage “need to be encouraged to take action with regards to lives. They can not lay on the sofa for the remainder of their lifestyle and you will create nothing. That’s a big problem.” Various other lady explained they that way, “Basically features my life with her while don’t, you must wade, … I recently need someone who has the lifetime together, who knows what they need, what they are carrying out … you just need to have your head best; you must have a great head-on the arms.” While the several other analogy, one girl demonstrated another companion throughout these terms: “Your gotta has actually prospective, your gotta actually have one thing taking place that have oneself because if I have some thing happening that have me, I am not attending correspond with individuals which is doing something smaller. So that you have to possess things opting for yourself that will in reality make me personally now have a conclusion to speak for you.”
Talk
Females considering thoughtful and you will expressive comments about their matchmaking beliefs. Whenever because of the possible opportunity to mention its dreams and you may wants having newest and future dating, female considering self-confident depictions of relationship and you may relationship that have the right mate. This depiction is somewhat in contrast to far established research and this too often illustrates Ebony people just like the vulnerable to your risk involvement and you may unhealthy behavior (Sullivan, Childs, & O’Connell, 2010). Recommendations gleaned because of these interview in manners dispels the idea that most Dark colored women don’t realize healthy matchmaking functions (Raiford ainsi que al., 2007). People inside sample discussed their better dating playing with terminology you to show self-confident attitudes out of adolescent newest and you can upcoming relationship.
Most readily useful Matchmaking Relationships when you look at the High school
Parallels and you will differences was indeed one another clear from African american girls’ narratives on an amazing relationships relationships, today and in the near future. Several themes emerged using their description of your own most useful relationships through the senior school: (1) temporariness of highschool dating, (2) with a partner who mutual equivalent knowledge and community agreements, and you can (3) importance of family relations from inside the determining a perfect dating. Various other themes came up in their description of greatest upcoming matchmaking: (1) fascination with matrimony, (2) monetary stability, and (3) requirements created. Likewise, in both the characterization of the most readily useful relationship while in the high school as well as in the future, girl discussed a desire for ‘top friend’ functions for example value, faith, and honesty. It’s guaranteeing to listen to one teenage Dark colored females set value on these characteristics and actively find them within personal relationships.
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